Am I Codependent?
Answer 10 honest questions to discover your relational pattern. Are you giving from overflow — or giving from a well that's run dry?
Your partner is having a bad day. What happens to your mood?
From your report: Your Defense System
Why do you love the way you do?
The Moon in the Mask position reveals something quietly devastating: the face you show the world when love gets close isn't cold — it's careful. You've learned to pre-empt abandonment by never fully arriving. The distance you create isn't indifference. It's a finely tuned survival mechanism built in a home where presence was punished...
$12.99 · Not what you expected? Full refund, no questions asked.
Book
Love Patterns
Why you keep choosing the same person in a different body. Attachment theory, trauma bonding, limerence, and earned security.
Get the Book — $14.99Understanding Codependency
Codependency was originally identified in partners and families of people with addiction, but the pattern extends far beyond that context. At its core, codependency is chronic self-abandonment — the habit of prioritizing others' needs so consistently that you lose track of your own.
Codependency isn't the same as being caring, generous, or empathetic. The difference is choice: healthy giving comes from genuine desire; codependent giving comes from the terror of what happens if you stop. When your value as a person depends on being needed, "selflessness" becomes a survival strategy rather than a virtue.
“Codependency disguises itself as love, but love doesn't require you to disappear. The moment you start confusing self-sacrifice with devotion, you've stopped giving and started surviving.”
The Four Relational Patterns
Healthy Independence
Clear boundaries, strong sense of self, gives generously from choice rather than obligation.
Healthy Interdependence
The ideal: two whole people sharing life together, leaning without collapsing.
Codependent
Identity fused with others, compulsive giving, boundaries dissolved, exhaustion masked as devotion.
Counter-Dependent
The other side of the coin — walls built so high that independence becomes isolation.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is codependency a mental health diagnosis?
Codependency is not a formal DSM-5 diagnosis, but it is widely recognized by mental health professionals as a significant relational pattern that often co-occurs with anxiety, depression, and CPTSD. Many therapists specialize in codependency recovery.
What causes codependency?
Codependency typically develops in childhood when love was conditional on being useful, quiet, or accommodating. Children who learn that their worth depends on managing others' emotions carry this pattern into adult relationships. It's an adaptation, not a defect.
This quiz is for self-reflection purposes only. It is not a clinical diagnosis or substitute for professional help.
Inner Child Quiz
Discover the childhood wound beneath your codependent pattern.
Attachment Style Quiz
How codependency shapes your attachment pattern.
Shadow Work Quiz
Meet the shadow archetype driving your relational patterns.
Explore More Spiritual Tools
Discover more ways to explore your spiritual journey
Looking for more spiritual guidance?